I help 10’s stop acting like 4’s so they never have to settle in love or life again.
Tessa Mac is a highly skilled Dating and Mindset Coach who specializes in guiding purpose-driven individuals towards building confidence, embracing their true selves, and finding love. Her transformative strategies are deeply rooted in alignment, authenticity, and subconscious reprogramming.
With over nine years of experience and thousands of coaching hours, Tessa has worked with a diverse range of clients, including prison inmates, burners, artists, educators, nine-figure CEOs, and serial entrepreneurs. Drawing from these invaluable experiences, she has crafted a transformative coaching practice that combines a reliable structure with customizable flexibility, essential for growth, self-actualization, and genuine connections.
While many clients initially seek Tessa’s guidance to improve their dating profiles, they often discover a journey that transcends romantic relationships. Tessa’s work dives beneath the surface, helping individuals uncover their true selves and address the layers they’ve built up to conform to others’ expectations. By the end of their journey, clients realize the importance of self-love and authenticity, ultimately attracting partners who appreciate and cherish the genuine version of themselves.
Tessa’s expertise is rooted in her extensive study of epistemology at the London School of Economics and her training in neuro linguistic programming (NLP) and Conscious Connected Breathwork, which she pursued alongside master practitioners across three continents. Her mission is clear: to empower impact-oriented men and women in finding love, fulfilling their purpose, and creating extraordinary lives.
Did you always envision yourself as an entrepreneur?
The concept of being an entrepreneur wasn’t even on my radar until several years ago. It’s possible that I briefly encountered the term during my time in grad school, but I never truly grasped the potential for substantial financial success.
Initially, I approached it purely as a source of enjoyment. At the age of 23, I ventured into the realm of being a dating coach, even though I lacked any substantial expertise. During that period, I worked at Tesla in New York, selling cars, and held a nightlife tour guide job I found on Craigslist to supplement my income. However, a peculiar thought crossed my mind one day: ‘What’s the most unconventional way I can earn money online?’ Instead of pursuing another traditional job, I decided to embark on this path.
Surprisingly, it turned out to be quite meaningful, garnering appreciation from numerous individuals. Despite my initial lack of credibility, I inadvertently discovered a talent for it. This is a common starting point for many dating coaches—they are driven by a desire to ‘save the world from heartbreak.’ In my case, it stemmed more from a place of enjoyment and excitement. Yet, I swiftly realized the profound impact I could make. To my surprise, several individuals went on to find their life partners, which is truly remarkable.
The business aspect of my journey took shape when I relocated to Bali and recognized the potential for establishing a legitimate career in this field. Prior to this realization, I often felt adrift and somewhat delayed in pursuing typical adult responsibilities. I sought solace through unconventional experiences, such as living in different countries and navigating the challenges of survival. It had become my norm. However, the revelation that I could be a coach, run a successful business, and genuinely earn a substantial income was a revelation to me. Strangely enough, no one had ever informed me of this possibility. Despite attending a reputable college, these aspects were never discussed, particularly within the philosophy department where I focused my studies for six years, alongside art. The absence of entrepreneurial discussions within that realm seems absurd in hindsight.
What led you to pursue relationship coaching?
Choosing relationship coaching was an organic process that found its way to me. Even in my personal life, I naturally gravitate towards intimate, one-on-one connections that delve into deep and meaningful experiences. It was this inclination that guided me towards the realm of coaching. Additionally, I found the realm of dating profiles to be incredibly fascinating and enjoyable. The idea of working within specific constraints and prompts, manipulating variables to achieve a desired outcome, captivated me. It’s truly intriguing to navigate the complexities and considerations involved in crafting a few sentences that have the potential to profoundly impact someone’s life. Over the course of my career, I’ve created over a thousand dating profiles, constantly refining my skills and techniques.
Describe your journey to enlightenment.
For a significant period of my life, I lived in a state of drifting, allowing circumstances to guide my path. However, I have since transitioned into a more intentional approach. Contrary to the belief that spontaneity and fun diminish when we gain clarity and plan ahead, I discovered that the opposite holds true in many instances. This shift in perspective occurred after undertaking an intensive NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) Master Practitioner course. Throughout the course, which entailed 800 hours of deep learning about the subconscious mind, I gained valuable insights into understanding people’s true intentions beyond their words and gestures. It enabled me to decipher the underlying messages individuals convey, often unknowingly, and truly comprehend their perspectives.
The first transformative lesson I ever learned was during my philosophy class at the age of 22, where we explored the topic of epistemology— the study of knowledge. Specifically, we delved into the nature of disagreements. It was eye-opening to realize that people often believe they are disagreeing about something while using the same word, when in reality, they are discussing entirely different concepts. For instance, if I were to ask you about your interpretation of a ‘kind person,’ your mental image and understanding would be shaped by your unique experiences. Consequently, our agreement or disagreement could stem from disparate definitions, unbeknownst to us.
If you could go back in time, what advice would you give to your younger self?
Self-doubt is an illusion that hinders our growth. It’s essential to recognize that there are alternative paths to achieve our goals, beyond what seems obvious in our immediate surroundings. It’s vital not to limit ourselves to the familiar and challenge the notion that there’s only one way to do things. Often, people may perceive you as eccentric until they realize your brilliance. Trusting your instincts, vetting your own opinions, and acknowledging your true feelings without relying solely on others’ input is crucial. I spent a considerable portion of my life assuming that others were flawless, and unless they explicitly admitted their mistakes, I accepted their perspectives as truth. I would shoulder unnecessary blame until I realized that I wasn’t as wrong as I believed.
There are instances when people fail to communicate their own errors, and we mustn’t automatically fault ourselves. Our society tends to prioritize maintaining the facade of being right rather than seeking genuine solutions. For many years, I found myself tirelessly attempting to comprehend situations without knowing how to ask the right questions.
Thus, mastering the art of asking insightful questions is arguably one of the most indispensable skills one can acquire. Instead of merely seeking answers, individuals often spend their lives assuming they’re posing the right inquiries.
How do you embody success in your life?
I embrace a variety of practices to manifest success in my life. Tracking my progress is essential to me, and I genuinely enjoy analyzing data. I consistently provide myself with constructive feedback and utilize an app that prompts me to reflect on how I felt throughout the day, what valuable lessons I learned, areas in which I excelled, and opportunities for improvement. Additionally, I make it a priority to spend a few minutes each day connecting with nature.
I firmly believe that aligning myself with the natural world is the most effective way to maintain balance and harmony. It’s important to note that alignment takes precedence over everything else, including love. While love is a profound emotion, it cannot thrive if it’s not in sync with the life we aspire to live and the essence of who we are.
Many of us, myself included, have experienced relationships where love existed, but the lack of alignment caused significant challenges and discord.
Could you share the practices you implement to remain in a state of ease and flow?
Journaling is a cherished practice of mine, particularly at night. I take the time to reflect on the day and document key insights. I ponder what I learned, acknowledge the positive aspects that transpired, and identify areas for improvement. These journal entries capture intriguing highlights and other noteworthy details.
I firmly believe that the magic of life resides in these intricate and nuanced moments. The more we can recall and appreciate these details, the more vibrant our experiences become, and the greater contextual understanding we gain.
What services do you offer to women seeking to join your community?
At the core of my services are high-ticket, one-on-one, personalized experiences. Additionally, I am in the process of developing a comprehensive course on creating exceptional dating profiles, although the exact launch date is yet to be determined. My expertise lies in crafting custom dating profiles that truly resonate with individuals. While I have plans for expansion, specific dates are still being finalized.
It is essential to note that I am selective about the clients I work with, focusing on individuals who are purpose-driven and actively contribute to making the world a better place on a larger scale. I believe that by collaborating with such individuals, I can extend my impact and create positive change. This selectivity allows me the privilege to decline clients who may not align with the values and vision I hold dear.
What are some of your significant manifestation goals?
My primary aspirations revolve around being a featured guest on aligned podcasts or channels and expanding my speaking engagements. I thrive in one-on-one interactions, and my area of expertise lies in assisting individuals who have a profound impact on raising the vibration of our planet.
My ultimate objective is to reach a wider audience and make a difference in more lives. I thoroughly enjoy both being interviewed and interviewing others. When it comes to financial success, I’ve discovered that whenever I raise my vibration, abundance naturally flows into my life. It’s not a coincidence that my income skyrocketed from a random $500 per month to six figures. I shifted my focus away from ego-driven desires, such as being featured in prestigious publications like Forbes or giving TED Talks. Instead, I realized that my true ambition lies in having a career that allows me to genuinely help people transform their lives. It brings me immense joy and fulfillment. So, my ultimate goal is to engage in fun and meaningful endeavors that positively impact others.
The rest, including opportunities like TED Talks and financial prosperity, will naturally align with my purpose. Initially, I looked up to highly successful coaches, but I soon realized that their approach didn’t resonate with my non-type A personality. I was attempting to mold myself into someone I’m not. That’s when I decided to prioritize fun and embrace my authentic self. Remarkably, the moment I made that decision, my income soared to six figures. It’s no exaggeration.
What is the most significant outcome you want your clients to gain from the work you do?
Above all else, my utmost desire is to empower my clients to create a life where, when they find themselves on their deathbed, they look back with no regrets. I am fully committed to doing whatever it takes to support them in this transformative journey, enabling them to live a life of fulfillment and purpose.
What would you say is your superpower?
I possess a couple of superpowers. Firstly, I have the extraordinary ability to engage in conversations with anyone, regardless of whether or not we have a prior connection. If I desire a specific person to be a part of my life for a particular reason, I make it happen, no matter the obstacles.
My second superpower lies in my aptitude for creatively piecing things together, connecting seemingly unrelated dots, and presenting them in a way that allows others to grasp the bigger picture. It’s an unconventional and imaginative approach that enables me to facilitate profound insights and understanding in those I work with.
Photography Credit – Tessa Mac Photos
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